Mama, Wife, and Teacher.. Who needs me now?

Too Creative?

2010-11-20T19:53:00.001-08:00

Today I threw my first baby shower. It was sooooo exciting. The theme was LSU football. It was a tailgating party welcoming a baby girl. I had a great time planning this shower. The colors were pink, purple, and gold. The big sister, who just turned 3, helped make cookies for favos with me yesterday. She decorated the cookies with purple and gold frosting. There was no design to it..just frosting lmao. The guest of honors were not told what the theme was. The best part was that the father-to-be was able to watch his favorite team play at the same. We played 0 games! That was fine because I forgot to buy prizes anyway. I made a great punch that should be bottled and served at restaurants. I'm proud of myself. Many people said we should use our creativity to start a business doing the invites and planning..hmmm why not?

Update....I've been M.I.A

2010-11-18T18:35:00.000-08:00

There is only one word that can explain why I have not typed a single word to you. CHILDREN!! Clearly they are the reason why I can't do anything, but I want to do so much!! So let's get an update on what is going on in my word.
MAMA'S WORLD
Right now Stinkers is 3 and in Pre-K 3 class. She has started dance classes and is the cutest little thing in there. She is absolutely uncordinated though which is kind of funny to watch. She tries hard though. She wants to be called by her first and last name now. You cannot call her by the nickname she has had since she was in the womb either. She likes the " Whip My Hair" song by Willow Smith. She wants to wear lipgloss and jewelry. Stinkers is everything that I have ever wanted in a little prissy girl.. I suppose. While other three year olds are wearing cute little slippers and pajamas around the house, she wears sundresses for pajamas and light up heels for slippers. JrJr will be two in a few weeks. He is a pure handful! We are starting potty training with him now. NIGHTMARE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! He is very vocal and active. The smart little guy is trying to count to the teens and say his alphabet. He loves to sing " bumble bee" and he calls it. He is nothing like he used to be...at all. I sometimes forget that he is not my little bitty baby anymore. I miss those days :( I can't remember the nickname I gave our 3rd and oldest child. He is now in Kindergarten and he just started basketball. He is learning how to read. It's amazing to see a child grow up!

Wife
I think that my Loverboy and I are at a fabulous time in our marriage. We are on the same page emotionally, sexually, and spiritually. He is showing me everyday why I chose love over independence. I am very happy I chose to be happy. Every marriage is hard and has it's ups and downs. I am just happy that we understand that and we work on it!

Teacher
I switched schools and grade levels. This will take a whole other day. Plus my carpel tunnel is starting to come it. I'll try to promise you atleast 10 minutes of my day from now on. It might just be a funny quote from a student. Who know!

Before My Morning Pee

2010-07-06T08:55:00.001-07:00

I have so much to do before I can even empty my bladder in the morning. My kids get up and demand that I free them. I have to put stinkers on the potty. Jr Jr will need his diaper changed. Then the breakfast requests come in. Stinkers wants cereal. Jr Jr wants "eat eat". I'm lucky that Jr Jr isn't old enough to put in a real request. Cereal it is. I pour them cereal and give them mandarin oranges. Before I can even walk away good, the boy has swallowed his oranges. Stinkers is begging for milk. My bladder is begging to be released. Just as I think I'm going to walk away, there is milk on the floor courtesy of my almost 2 year old. I clean them, clean dishes, and find Dora or Blues Clues for the toddlers. Then I run to the bathroom barely making it. Before I can sit down they come running in!lo

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Good-Bye Boobs!

2009-10-18T21:09:00.000-07:00

I had boobs for over an year! It was the best year too. I was able to understand what it felt like to run and need to actually hold them. My bra looked like it was actually supporting something. I had cleavage. I was sooo happy. But a few weeks ago they left....and never came back. I nursed JrJr for the very last time. I didn't know it was going to be the last time though.
Had I known that the last time that I tossed him on to my boobs for a meal would've been the Last Supper then I would've made a big deal about it. I can be a drama Queen when I need to be. I think JrJr got cheated out of the whole weaning anxiety thing. He basically realized that bottles weren't so bad and accepted it. There wasn't any drama at all about it.
I feel so great about how long I was able to nurse my son. He was a boob baby for 10 months. I wanted to go 12 months but it was wearing me out. He wouldn't sleep through the night. He wanted to boob at crazy hours of the night and it was toooo much!

So how do I feel about it. I'm okay. I hate buying formula and making bottles! But I love that I can toss back a bottle of wine now and not worry about waiting 3 hours before feeding my son.

Okay..how do I really feel? I MISS MY BOOBS! I was never the girl with the big ones. I could without wearing a bra if I needed to. Before I got pregnant with my son, I bought a 32A and proudly put it on. I used to be a B cup before nursing Stinkers. I don't know my size now. I do know that I will need a great miracle..as in MIRACLE BRA! I need the cups, wires, padding, pushing, and extra support. I won't get a boob job..ever! But I would like to pretend that I have boobs again and I will do it the artificial way.

16 Steps to a Nervous Breakdown.

2009-10-08T19:00:00.000-07:00

There are many steps to having a breakdown. Some people have mastered the massive breakdown that causes pills, hospitalization and medication. I am in no way making fun of that. But this post is meant to be humorous. Although what I say is true..I am laughing at myself. So here are the following steps in having a breakdown on a perfectly good Thursday!

1- Wake up and realize that you washed your work pants but you did not dry them. Notice the time on the clock says 6:20 and you need to walk out of your house at 6:420. You have wet pants! Put your wet pants in the dryer and run around your home trying to get children ready for the day. Wash bottles and skip breakfast because you don't have time. Then go get your pants out of the dryer with the pockets still damp and put them on.

2- Check the clocks on the microwave and the oven but not your phone. Your phone as the correct time. The clocks and microwave are two minutes slow. Two minutes is nothing..unless you have to fight with Houston traffic. Being two minutes behind is equivalent to being 15 minutes to an hour behind. It can really do that to you. Prepare to run out of the door at 6:42 because you gave your pants a little extra time to dry. Kiss your husband good-bye and realize that your phone says 6:44. You needed to be in your car by that time.

3- Pull up to your job with 2 minutes to spare after nearly running a few red lights. Get out of your car and realize that you have the baby's carseat in your car. Your husband can't even come to the job to pick it up because he'd need to bring the baby who can't ride in a car without a carseat. Stand in your corner and monitor kids who have to be told how to walk on a yellow line and panic! Then call your husband 5-10 times to warn him that you have the seat. Then you also realize that your baby was pretty warm at 4 am but did not have a fever. If you're going to drive all the way home you might as well find out if you're going to stay because one child has a fever. Express that to your husband who won't understand but will tell you that the other child sounds horrible. Tell your husband that you don't care about her cough but he needs to take her temp to make sure she doesn't have a fever either. Find out that none of them have fevers. Breathe!

4- Split your students into different classrooms so that you can run out of the door. Leave your cellphone in your classroom that is the last one in the hall and rush back to it.

5- Race home, walk through the door, drop the seat in and have your husband ask you where the toddler's shoes are. Run in the house, look in the bathroom and her bedroom searching for brown Mary Jane shoes. You won't find them there because they will be in the closet on the shelf that is designated for her shoes to be so that you don't have to look for them. Avoid saying anything to your husband about not looking for things because you have a premature breakdown and you have not completed the steps.

6- Go back to work and realize that you didn't turn in a form that was due the day before and the person who needs is sweet and you love her and don't want to disappoint her. Make up a lie and turn it in late.

7- Get reminded a few times about bringing home a projector for a presentation that you have the next day.

8- Run out of the workplace a half and hour later than normal, fight traffic to pick up kids, and take two small children to Walmart. Order 2 chocolate chip cookies when you clearly see just one. Say cookies loud enough for your two year old daughter to hear and then wait for her to cry. Have the manager tell you that there is a 2 minute wait on fresh cookies. Ask for the one cookie you can see, give it your daughter, and then wait 2 minutes for a cookie.

9- Get the fresh baked cookie that is too soft to eat and give it to your daughter. She will cry because it's too soft to pick up and eat and is falling apart.

10- Get in line behind the person who is paying for her items with stacks of quarters. Immediately leave because if you say you have a premature breakdown.

11- Head to your car inthe parking lot and celebrate that your potty training daughter remained dry. Reward her with a sip of your Icee. She will then cough really hard a few times until you feel that she is about to throw up. Hold her and watch blue Icee and chocolate chip cookies hit the charcoal pavement of Walmart. She made it out the store without them cleaning urine but now you are holding her hands and hair back like she is a freshman at FSU. In the middle of that realize that you did indeed leave the projector at school.

12- Listen to dryheaving all the way home and panic about how you will do your presentation tomorrow. Call all the coworkers you can think who would stay at a job 4 hours later on a weekend with a holiday attached to it. No one will answer of course.

13- Get home and allow your children to whine and cry for things to drink. Make your daughter a TV dinner and then listen to her eat and cry and eventually throw up her dinner. Hold her hands and hair once again and let her vomit all over her tray. But remove the food. You are not wasting food no matter what!

14- Run bathwater to cheer your sweetie up because she loves them. She will then beg to get out. She will run to the dining room table and grab her juice and spill it all over her naked, still wet body. Pick her up, dry her tears, and put her back in the bathwater that is still there and still warm!

15. Take her out again and attempt to dry her off. She will cry and allow you to put a diaper on her and nothing else. She will run to the bed and be done! An hour later you will realize that you left the salisbury steak you bought at Walmart in the car and it's 80 something degrees outside. You've been home for almost 2 hours.

16- Log on to Facebook and find out from your sister that NASA plans on putting a hole in the moon AND....

HAVE A NERVOUS BREAKDOWN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

No BBQ or D huh?

2009-09-08T19:37:00.000-07:00

Last night before heading to bed I checked my work email. Now why did I do such a thing? I decided early on this year to stop checking my email at home. It was because I didn't want to be tempted to do anything and because I wanted to remember what they wanted me to do while at work. This was when I cared about what they wanted me to do. But...I made a mistake. I opened Pandora's Box. Keep in mind that yesterday was Labor Day. It's something like a National Holiday. No mail, no school, no banks type of shit! But nope...not for my boss. She's either an overachiever or a pure asshole.

She went to work on a holiday. She not only went to work but she did work. She walked through all the classrooms, looked inside of the desks, and critiqued our classrooms. She made a list of things she didn't like and then typed the list up and put the notes in our mailboxes. She didn't like the way my word wall was. She asked me to organize some stuff. It was just pretty pointless the way she did that.

So I came to the conclusion that A) she didn't get invited to a BBQ or B) she couldn't get any dick yesterday. Now on Labor Day if you're married you're bound to get one or the other. So damn sad!

So Potty Training is NOT the devil.

2009-08-10T21:04:00.000-07:00

The first day of potty training.. I was done! We started introducing Stinkers to the potty around January. It was just an introduction. But the goal was to have her ready for panties by the time she turned 2. She turns 2 next week. The first real day she went through 3 pairs of panties in an hour and half. I was soooo confused. She knows the " pee pee in the potty" ( you were supposed to sing that!). Why was she just sitting there streaming away in her undies like that. I then decided to put on her brand new Princess panties. The funniest thing happened. She remained dry. The next day she did it again. She only peed in her diaper during naptime. She stayed dry in her Princess panties. I was impressed.

But..she won't poop on the potty. She will wait until she has to put on a diaper for travel or serious play and then let it loose. Speaking of letting it loose. Hubs decided to let the kids jump on the bed while he watches. He had no idea that you shouldn't allow a child who is potty training to jump on the bed and have a grand ole time. I heard the joyful sounds of a brother and sister laughing and having a good time. Then I heard, " __ __ peed in the bed!" I went in the room calmly and told her it was okay. I let her know that I understood that she was having a good time and didn't think about that tingling feeling she got that she needed to use the potty. Then as I removed her from the wet spot near my pillow, my oldest child decided to put his hand in her urine. So I fussed at him, then his dad fussed at him and went back to my pissy child. I put Stinkers in the bathroom and washed her up really good. They were about to watch Free Willy so I decided that she needed to wear a diaper. It was bedtime anyway.

Today was a tricky one though. We were at Walmart ( my favorite store) and I had to use the restroom. I am an adult and knew to use the restroom before going grocery shopping but hey I needed to go. I took Stinkers into the family restroom so she would have room to not touch nasty things. I did what I needed like a woman who doesn't like toilet germs would. Well then suddenly Stinkers had to go too. She starts saying " pee pee" and trying to pull down her skort and take off her diaper. So I think about how discouraging it would be if I told her that she could use the potty. I place a thousand seat covers on the toilet and allow her to use the potty. She did. But it's not over. She also wants to wipe herself. I cannot handle all of that. It was too much for a public restroom. But I was sooo proud that she kept her diaper dry and let me know she had to go potty. Go Stinkers.

So potty training is not the devil if you have princess panties.

Happy Anniversary to us!

2009-07-19T20:37:00.000-07:00

Oh this time last year I was having as much fun as one pregnant woman could in a hot heavy wedding dress. I was pissed about people rsvping wrong or not showing up for our wedding. And it rained on my wedding day. Well it rained today as well. But that is not what I am going to blog about.

Hubs and I dropped off the children yesterday. Many people asked why they had to go to 3 different people. Not many people have a truck or the room to put 3 carseats in so we had to split them. Not many people can be Superwoman like myself either. Each of them went to people whom we trusted to care for them and to spoil them rotten. I am so grateful for those people. But I am also not going to blog about the care of my children. This post is dedicated to the fantastic job I did planning our staycation. Do you hear that? It's me tooting my own horn!

Saturday: We dropped the kids and made it to the hotel by about 4. My schedule had us arriving at 3 to check in but I was flexible with our check in and immediate plans. We stay at Hotel Icon in downtown Houston. It is a beautiful hotel. It has such a romantic feel to it. We were onthe ninth floor with a great view of downtown. If we would've gotten stuck in our room for the night we would've been satisfied. So after our vehicle was parked and clothes were hung we headed out to our first stop. Hubs loves sharks, lions, alligators, tigers, and bears. Basically if it can bite the shit out of you..he loves it! So I took him to the Downtown Aquarium to see the exhibits. We walked the streets of downtown and noticed things that we had never seen before. There were many things that we might've passed in the evening on our way to a club.

The first thing Hubs noticed was the opportunity to ride a train and to see the sharks. The great thing is that you HAVE to ride the train to see the sharks. We purchased our tickets and stood in line for almost an hour to see sharks. There was a DJ there and he played many of the songs we grew up to from MC Hammer to Vanilla Ice. We laughed at the children around us and really appreciated having a day free of children. The train ride was a mere 15 minutes or less. The sharks were pretty cool but he was more fascinated than I was. It began to rain a little so we called the hotel to have the shuttle pick us up. We were looking for a van, a Benz came to get us. It was a nice 3 minute ride back to the hotel.

When we got back into our room we showered ( and fell in love with the shower) and got dressed for dinner. I made reservations at Mia Bella Trattoria which is also downtown. My plans were for us not to drive while downtown. Well by the time we got ready to go, it was pouring down raining. We got soaked in the rain. My hair was a mess. But it was worth it. We both love Italian cuisine. This restaurant was fab. The wine was great. We loved the atmosphere. The seats are pretty closed together but we didn't feel like our space was being violated. By the time we left it was no longer raining and the lights of downtown were beginning to shine.

We returned to our room and tried to figure out the television ( we never really did). I had ordered us a bath butler. They came and ran us a perfect bath! I knew the bath was coming but I had no idea what to expect. Hubs was so impressed. It was actually one of our favorite part of the night. It was so relaxing and so needed. After coming in wet from the rain we needed this hot bubble bath. We had pink champagne and chocolates to enjoy. It was what I call " romantical". I just loved the rose petals.

Go ahead an picture yourself in that bathtub. You just got instantly relaxed huh? Oh but the night was not over. We drank some more and got dressed and went to Club Isis. I loved it! We danced all night long. Afer we walked back to the hotel we noticed a little cuban/mexican restuarant that closed at 3 a.m. We had ourselves a taco and went home to bed.

It was a fantastic day!

Sunday ( Our actual anniversary): We woke up refreshed after getting a nice night of sleep without being interrupted by a JrJr. We checked out and headed to our favorite cupcake place, The Dessert Gallery on Post Oak. We realized that the food was going to be high and not fulfilling so we went next door and ate. I can't remember the name of the restuarant but the service was great and the food was wonderful as well. Then we headed to get our cupcakes. Hubs got a brownie instead and I got cupcake like the ones we served at our wedding. Strawberry with cream cheese is the best!

From there our next appointment was at Massage Heights. The service was great there. I had a great time knowing Hubs was getting a well deserved massage. He works so hard for us. He really needed this. After our hour massage ( really less than 50 minutes), we went to Hermann Park to ride the Pedal Boats. We could barel get out of the docking area. It was so funny. We had 30 minutes to relax on the water and laugh at ourselves not steer the boat correctly. I couldn't remember a time where we had so much fun alone.

Finally, we picked up our rugrats and headed home. Our anniversary daycation was one of THE best times we've had together in a long time. It was so appreciated by both of us. Happy Anniversary to us!

52 Naughty Nights: Wheels of Love

2009-07-19T20:31:00.000-07:00

I know I said I wouldn't share what the cards said to do if it was my my husband's turn to pick. But he didn't even do his week and I have been slacking. So I decided to share it. Now I don't blame him for not doing his week because it was impossible for him to do it with our children. But those of you with no children. Have at it!

Wheels of Love: Turn your car into the love making mobile. One night this week take your lover for a drive and find a deserted country road, an empty parking lot, or maybe the garage suits you fine. See, if you can't get the car rocking and the windows good and steamy!

Make sure you fill up before going to the deserted road!

The Language of Love?

2009-07-05T10:10:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I was at a wonderful BBQ. I mean it was a great time for the husbands, wives, and kids. But being the observant person that I am, I noticed something. Couples don't always talk to each other in the most friendly way. Think about it. The one person that you probably disrespect, get smart with, or "talk crazy" to is your significant other. There was couple there who was trying to figure out if their house was locked or not. The wife knew it was because she had just tried to run home. The husband argued with her that it wasn't. Then he asked " What do you mean locked?" Her response was sarcastic but humorous to me. And then she looked at me and said " We've been married for 11 years!". While she was saying that I was also commenting that they must've been married for some time. She knew to say just enough to get her frustration out but not to disrepect him. We all laughed and then shared how long we had been married. I was really thinking about how we as spouses snap at each other. While others may not know our relationship we are showing them a side that is not quite lovely. I know we know how far we can go with each other but not everyone else does.
About a week ago Hubs got upset with me for rolling my eyes at him. Yes, it was immature but it was better than me saying what I really felt. He would've really been pissed! But I thought about other things. Would I have rolled my eyes at his brother? his mother? my friends?(yes)my boss? So why would I roll my eyes at the man who is numero uno in my life ( Next to God of course). At the same time I tell him constantly that he should talk to me in a manner that he would talk to his mother. I made it clear that once you cuss at me, the conversation is clearly over! I won't be verbally abuse by anyone but my mama! lol.
If you watch Jon and Kate +8 then you can recall how Kate spoke to Jon all the time. Not only was it in public but it was on national TV. How humiliating is that? Well if you have kids it doesn't matter if it was in public or not. Your household is enough. Your children will now pick that up. I guarantee that your son or daughter will now talk to one of you like that, or even another adult. How embarassing would that be?
I now will be more aware of how I speak to Hubs in front others. I would never want to disrespect him in front of people. I leave the disrespect for home!

Delay in the 52 Weeks

2009-06-28T13:30:00.000-07:00

It's going to be time to step back into the black satin bag soon. But due to health reasons we're going to have to hold back until next week. But that won't stop the love. I can't go into the bag because it may tell us to do something physical that we can't do. So for my OWN naughty nights.. I'm going to simply take it back to Junior High or whenever you started going crazy with hormones. Think back to when a kiss made your body tingle. Well that is where I will go this week. This week will be all about the lips. When I was in high school my boyfriend and I challenged ourselves to a certain number of kisses. Well this week I am going to do that with Hubs. So for your Naught Nights this week here is the challenge:

Capture Kisses

Objective: To get as many kisses from your partner ( I'm keeping up with the times) as you can!

Rules: You just can't tell them when or where to kiss you.

Points:

You get 1 point for every kiss they initiate that reaches your lips.

You get 2 points for every kiss you get that goes anywhere else.

They get the same amount of points as you for your kisses.

Be sure to keep track of your kisses!

Now how do you determine the winner? EASY! You make a wager first. In my household the loser would get kitchen duty for a week. HANDS DOWN! Then you flip a coin. Heads: The winner is the person who got the fewest points. Tails: The winner is the person who has the most points.

Now get to kissing! You never know who is going to win. In the end your relationship will be the winner!

52 Weeks of Naughty Nights: Week 1

2009-06-23T11:36:00.000-07:00

This is coming from the wife in me! If you have read my blog you know that I am a firm believer in having a healthy sexy relationship. You need to flirt, leave love notes, buy cards just because, pat each other on the butt, kiss for no reason, watch a flick together at times, walk around naked. Do whatever you have to do to keep the flame going. So I went to my first sex toy party last month and I didn't want to spend too much on toys and gadgets that aren't warm and not Hubs. So I purchased a "game" called 52 weeks of Naughty Nights.

Our schedules get hectic and our children wear us out so I thought that maybe something like this would keep our bed hot! You have about 100 cards in a satin bag. Each week one of us will pull a card and scratch it off. The card will tell us to plan something or do something kinky. The cards either say " For her to read" or " For him to read". Last night was our first night and it said "For her to read". So here is what it said.

5 Days of Seduction

Start this week off by sending your lover a sexy love note promising a night he'll never forget. Each day following entice him with suggestive instructions, tantalizing visions and alluring possibilities. He'll be ready to explode by the week's end!

For the 52 weeks of naughty nights I will only be sharing what I am to read..and the planning. I won't be telling you all what I actually did. I don't need you picturing me and Hubs doing what we do. And I won't share what the kinky cards tell us to do for that same reason. I think I will also post in red because it's hot! So if you don't purchase the cards or what a taste of what they are like and need to pump of your sex life.. here you go! Enjoy

Note to Self: Restaurants and Naptime Don't Mix!

2009-06-22T20:46:00.000-07:00

Father's Day was good. It could've been better but I didn't plan anything. Gasp! I'm a horrible mother and wife because I didn't plan anything? Nope, I'm not. It's 100 degrees here and we have 3 children. For one we can't be cramped in a building unless the children can run like crazy. Did you get that it was 100 degrees outside? Well that means that we couldn't be outside either. JrJr would have been miserable and that means I would've been miserable.

Since I'm speaking on being miserable so soon I will get to the point. After church we decided to not wait and just hit up the Italian restaurant that Hubs wanted to check out. Yay for Italian my food( my fav). But it was just about 1:00 p.m. For those of you who are not mothers let me translate this for you. It was naptime. Stinkers was wore out. She is used to sleeping in ( and so are we). But it was Sunday and I had to get three children ready for church and allow Hubs to sleep in. Her big brother..let's call him #1( He is the oldest anyway) does not sleep late. So they children were up by 7:30. Well not JrJr because he sleeps with us. Anyway so by 1:00 Stinkers is delirious! She didn't want to eat her food. She didn't want to drink her pink lemonade. She only wanted to wear one shoe. She wanted to sit in Daddy's lap. #1 is whining about some water that has dripped onto his chair, and about Stinkers touching his stuff and anything else he can. Hubs ends up eating his food with Stinkers in his lap and constantly letting #1 know that he is fine.

What a great meal!! When it was time to go, I couldn't strap those kids in quicker. They got home and slept so peacefully though. They took a very long nap. That left Hubs time to play his game and we didn't have to make any further plans for the day! Yay!

So 4th graders can get married too?

2009-05-03T20:16:00.000-07:00

My eldest student who will graduate at 21( Read that mess below) always give me the good dish on what is going on in the school. So in my classroom there is some ish going on. First of all he is in love with another classmate. He says they have been "going out" for 2 months. They even "kicked it" on her birthday. I mean he is so in love with her. I have taken two notes from him to her. The first one mentioned how fine she was and the reason why he stared at her so much. The second one that I took just this past week asked him when she wanted to kiss. Oh the big kiss!
Do you remember when you got your first big kiss? I got mine in the 4th grade too. I was on the school playground at recess. But for some reason I am still shocked at my little babies kissing. But it has not stopped at kissing. I was also told that one cootie couple got married on Friday. The guy actually got down on one knee and proposed to her. I felt like this fourth grade girl got more than what some women will ever get. Another student tried to cheat on his girlfriend and sent a note to one asking if they wanted to be his girlfriend. In the end he got caught and dumped. Then there is one more couple who argues nightly on the phone.

But the hearbreaking couple is my sweetie pie. My teacher's pet. My own little angel. She has fallen for the leader of the newest gang. ( yes, there is a gang) She is head over heels in love with him. She will not listen to me as I tell her that she is a good guy and he is slum. She doesn't care though. So on Friday she wore eyeshadow and lipgloss and broke my heart.

Now of all of these couples only one set are married. I'm wondering when I will have to stop teaching subjects of educational matter and become the marriage counseler.

Not To Self: Boys have penises and Girls have vaginas

2009-02-27T15:58:00.000-08:00

These are more of my random thoughts. But these thoughts come throughout the day. So periodically I will start blogging my notes.

My favorite part of taking care of my children is bathtime. I have been blessed to have two adorable children who love to take baths. So when they are having an off the wall day, I give them baths. I don't care if I bathe them everyday. It makes them happy. JrJr really loves bathtime. But he does something weird everytime. EVERY SINGLE TIME he takes a bath, he pees. But that is not the interesting part. He can make his pee shoot out of the water. The powerful stream of urine comes out of the tub and can actually land in another small tub of water. I use another container of warm water to rinse his hair out. He can make his stream shoot out of the bathtub and into his other container. I am amazed everytime I see that. So now I wonder..how can he do that? I always thought the pee would just start streaming in the tub.

So then I began to really wonder something. Has my Stinkers been peeing in the tub all this time? Have I been washing her in her own urine? Hmmmmm. I sure am learning about this. At least I learned quickly to not get R-Kellied on anymore.

21 and graduating?

2009-02-11T20:35:00.000-08:00

This blog is supposed to be about me as a mother, wife, and teacher. I got all of these titles within 2-3 years of each other. I haven't touched on my teaching part because I was maternity leave for damn near two years. Anyway, I finally have a teaching moment to share. I work in the hood. There is no way to sugarcoat it. I have students who are 9, 10, 11, and 12 in my classroom. Nope the 9 and 10 year olds are not gifted. They did not skip a grade or two. I don't teach a split class of 4/5th or 5th/6th. I teach 4th grade. I have a student who turned 12 in December. He will graduate at 21 for this reason. He is failing the 4th grade. That calculates to him leaving the public school system at 21. He doesn't care though. When the administrator and I try to get him to get right, he gets an attitude. He spends days suspended or in detention due to behavior.

Before you throw him a surprise pity party..he is not dumb. He is actually smart. But he does not give any effort. Unfortunately I don't give grades either. They earn grades. So if he refuses to work or turn in work then he refuses to earn a good grade. If you go to work and refuse to work, then I am sure your boss will refuse to pay you. So here I am stuck with a child who is going through things hormonal that these other students are not going through. There is no way I'd want my 14 year old in the same school as him in high school. Who will he take to prom? At 18 he will be too old to date his classmates. But what grown woman will want to date someone still in highschool?

So it turns to the fact that he may not even graduate from high school. Great! The black community needs another high school drop out with no motivation. What will I do?

Poopy In the Potty

2009-02-08T19:41:00.000-08:00

You know that you're a mom when you get excited about poop. On a normal regular day in our home you might hear this, " Did Stinkers poop today?" Yes, we care about that. But we are actually just trying to see who will catch the poop. Today Hubs asked me if I woke him up telling him about JrJr pooping all over the place. Weird man! He had a dream about it I suppose.
I think it's sad when we're getting to the point of dreaming about our children's poop. Now I'm not like Jon and Kate. I will not take pictures of poop. But Stinkers pooped in the potty. I never knew that her poop would bring me so much joy. The great thing is that she didn't do it in the bathtub. I have not had that happen to me yet. This was very close though. I am not potty training Stinkers. I just want to introduce her to it. She just happens to be doing very well at it. She has gone at least once a day this week. I am too excited. Not so excited that I could poop my pants though!

TV Fast Day 4

2009-01-25T11:52:00.000-08:00

It's the weekend!! So yesterday ( Saturday) Hubs came home and he didn't turn the TV on. He went quite a while without it actually. I was so impressed. I came home from a birthday party with Stinkers and JrJr and there was no sound of sports. I ended up running some errands to prepare to go out. Hubs eventually watched some TV. But it was completely fine because it was a TV day. When I returned home from my night out with the girls, he was playing his game. I think he plays his video game more than he watches television. I don't have a problem with the game. He talks to me and asks questions and listens while he plays. I used to nag him about it but I stopped. I stopped because he started participating more. I'm not at all saying that he is a slack dad. But when I ask him to do something he will turn it off. I appreciate that.

TV Fast Day 3

2009-01-24T11:39:00.000-08:00

Friday's TV fast was also pretty lame. Hubs came home and he watched a little ESPN or NFL Network. I can't keep up. Well he went to hang out with his homie. I put Taylen to bed and I turned on the TV to watch Nancy Grace. I just had to watch something. I was bored out of my mind. I didn't even want to be on the internet. I had JrJr and a smoothie and Nancy Grace. Now to look on the positive side of it. I wasn't ignoring my children. I wasn't ignoring my spouse. But I also wasn't spending that time talking to God. I know I know.. I've got to do better!

TV Fast Day 2

2009-01-23T17:49:00.000-08:00

Day two of the T.V. fast was a flop!! A complete flop!! We watched T.V. Hubs started it though! He started with the game, and then Unique Whips, and then The First 48 and the next thing I know.. I'm watching a penile fracture on Grey's Anatomy. The GOOD thing about us watching T.V. was that it was shows that we both enjoy. We weren't ignoring each other. Taylen was already in bed so she wasn't being ignored either. To be honest, I think just the fact that we are making an attempt at it is, is doing us some good. Now, I haven't gotten to the spiritual part of it yet. My goal is to give God 15 minutes, then 30 minutes, then 45 minutes. I would like to gradually increase that time. But I want me and Hubs to spend that time together( seeking God) more than anything. Thursday could've been better but if nothing else, our electricity bill will be lowered.

The TV Fast

2009-01-22T13:05:00.001-08:00

My homegirl ReeBok told us about a TV fast that she and her husband did. She said they didn't watch TV for two weeks. She let us know that it helped them spiritually and it basically put a peace in their home. I am all for fasting ( although I've never done it before) for the Lord. My church is currently doing a food fast. I am nursing and it would not be wise to do that at this moment. But I believe that going without the television in our home will bring us closer to God. Being closer to God will bring us closer to each other, our children and our goals as a family.

So yesterday was day one. I woke up with the children and I did not turn on the tv. I actually started cleaning up. I began to notice the mess in our home. I have been getting nagged more and more by husband. I don't think it's as bad as he says it is. But at the same time I felt his need to not let it get worse. So I began with my own closet, moved to our room, and then the living room. I did fine. I had Kanye West and Common to jam to.

Hubs came home and he remembered not to turn on the T.V. He went to the computer instead. We caught up on the day. We had small talk. Small talk is better than no talk at this point. I made plans to get my hair done. Hubs made it about 3 hours and then he needed some T.V. He watched about an hour or so of television while I was away. When I returned he played his video game. But that didn't stop him from helping me take care of the house and kids. I was grateful for that.

So day one was okay.

Thank goodness for family restrooms!

2009-01-20T21:56:00.000-08:00

My hubs and I went shopping today. He is determined to make me a hot mama! And I need him to become one again. So we went to NY&Co and I got a few pairs of pants. But unfortunately we realized some really awful news. I no longer have anything remotely close to an ass. I do however have nice boobs. But again.. no ass! I am back to prepregnancy weight at 6 weeks postpartum ( YAY!!). But today I didn't feel good about being so small. I was like damn..I can't fit anything. I ended up with two pairs of pants and three shirts. Hubs picked out a cute shirt. I'd love it in any color. But it's red..so I just like it.

From there we went to the outlet stores. I was soo excited to see what great deals we would find. Well I got some cute wedges to wear with my going back to work clothes. Hubs calls them the shoes with the chunk on the bottom. Anyways..we have two babies in diapers and they are both pissy. I know what it is like to take a double stroller into a bathroom. I also know how hard it is to change two diapers back to back. Then I thought..FAMILY RESTROOM! I was so excited that hubs could help me change some diapers. We wouldn't be cramped in one restroom. I wouldn't have to be afraid of a lady who doesn't wash her hands coming to touch Stinkers. So Hubs took Stinkers into the family restroom, I took JrJr and we got the thing done soo fast. I felt like Jon and Kate without the crybaby twin and the other kids.

We went on our way shopping and picking out clothes. It was a great time for us. JrJr slept most of the time. Stinkers didn't whine and had some cute moments. I felt like my old self again. I am ready to return to work now that I know I will cute!

We even got a 44% off discount at Kenneth Cole. It was in honor of our 44th President Barack Obama. Why today? Ummm because today Obama took over our country. It was special to see that moment. I woke up like it was Christmas and ran to the living room. I could hear Hubs telling Stinkers that Obama was her President. I was looking forward to him taking that oathe. It's not just because he is black. It is because we are ready for a change.

Today was terriffic Tuesday. I got clothes and new President. Yay!

I can handle this...right?

2009-01-13T18:37:00.000-08:00

So just to catch you up on things... I have a 17 month old daughter. She was born premature on August 20, 2007. It was a whirlwind birth but she's doing great! Then when she was six months old I got pregnant again. I had another little bundle of joy on December 5, 2008. Yup, I have a toddler who just learned to walk and a baby who is learning to be a baby.

Today I woke up and decided to continue to blog. Why? So that I can put into writing why I am going crazy. Before you call the postpartum people, I am not really going crazy..yet. See not only do I have to learn to be a mother but I have to learn to be a wife. A domestic wife at that. I remember the first time that my hubs asked for spaghetti for dinner. I said "sure" as if I was a goddess in the kitchen. I immediately went to the computer and IM'd my cyber bff. She laughed at me for not knowing how to make one of the most simple meals a person could make. So I did my best and low and behold the man like it. I was shocked.

So here I am today looking up recipes. I go to www.allrecipes.com for my meals. I tweak them a bit and make them for our home. We like to eat but we don't eat all of that. Some people can just go online and find a picture and say " Hmmm that looks good! I think I'll make it!". I go online and look at the ingredients that I know I don't have. I don't even know how to properly season things. Then I have to see if the meal can be made in an half hour. I can usually make Stinkers ( the girl) snack for about that long. Now I have to add in being able to make it inbetween JrJr's( the boy)feeding. He's nursing and I can't just open the oven with a child on the boob. So I found a great recipe today. I'm very excited to make it.
I just gave Stinkers a bath and put her to bed. I'm all good for cooking for just me and hubs. Before you gasp thinking I sent her to bed without dinner. I did not. I fed her some spaghetti and lima beans ( a whole other topic). So I am all ready to do the meal and I am missing an ingredient. As freaking usual! But the show will go on. I have an 18 oz box of Corn Flakes( the cheapest box I could find) and I only need 1/4 a cup of it. I have a small bottle of ranch dressing when I needed to get the package. But I'm ready to make this meal. So let's get cooking before JrJr starts screaming!

Married...Oh yeah!!

2008-08-01T20:13:00.000-07:00

This may come off as pretty damn dumb. But now that I am married, I feel so different. I feel like I am more special. I feel complete! Now that is a great feeling right there. My husband and I are really do complete each other. His vows said so. My vows..not so much. They were from the heart but what had happened was...I left my vows at home and had to write them over minutes before the ceremony.

If this was a wedding blog, I'd post a huge recap of our day. But this is a random thought blog and I just don't have the time.

Back to my random thoughts. I was never a baby mama. I don't think it is anything wrong with being one either. It's only negative because of the word that usually comes after it " drama". Anyway! We were always going to get married. I just happened to get pregnant ( twice) before the wedding could come.

You get so many stares and horrible treatment when you are pregnant or have a child, or in my case pregnant and carrying a baby with no wedding band on. Now I'm not the type to care what people think but now that I have this band on I feel like shouting.. " SEE! There is a such thing as black love!!". To add to that.. young black love. We didn't live together for 10 years and then finally decide to get married. We didn't let our family get grown and leave the house first.
There are many stereotypes to black love and I am happy to be a part of the shattering team.

Back to my marital bliss!! So I wake up every morning and I think.."Oh my goodness! This man is mine forever!". I say a quick prayer that is so quick it should be called a thought ( I need to work on that) that God helps us to be forever and not to end up in divorce for any reason at all. I mean I vowed to him that I would love him even after eternity and that is what I want. If we stay just like this ( I know there are things called ups and downs) I would have no reason to ever be unhappy.

I like to make phone calls and say " My husband" or "Yes, I'm his wife". I like to hear him say , " My wife and I". I loved when I went to the doctor today and they called me first name new last name. I was sooo excited like I had won something. I looked back on our wedding pictures today and I just thought over and over about how blessed I am. I am his and he is mine and there is no one in our inner circle. There really isn't a greater feeling than this ( at this moment..we'll see when my new baby is born)

All Grown Up!!

2008-07-03T19:09:00.000-07:00

The wedding has been driving me nuts!! I am so close to our wedding date. I am finally getting excited that my family will be here with me. I look at our wedding day as such a celebration for our families. I am excited about my siblings making it to Houston. I have always went to them and this time they will come to me for something.

This evening my brother sent me a text message. I am going to copy what he wrote. He is not a blood brother. We grew up in different households around the corner from each other. But in our hearts we are brother and sister. He is two years older than me. He is just as overprotective as my brothers are. My kids will never know that he is not my real brother. Maybe when they get older to figure it out but that will be after the bond has been made.

So the first text says : Can't wait til 2 weeks. I need to see my goddaughter and ur future husband. I'm glad u happy sis. That's from da heart.

So then I tell him not to be crying at the ceremony. His reply :LMAO if I do its off your face and love. U know how we R. I always think about da day I left 2 college. U left work and gave da book U made. I cried. I couldn't read all of it. I know it was real. U r my sis and dats it. I never been dat touch. And I never told u but man I read that everyday and still do.

I was in the process of texting him and telling him how I have always considered him to be my real brother and that my daughter will know him as that. We've been this close now for 12 years.

He was sending this text at the same time : U so grown now. I damn I just feel like U r my blood sis U know.

This was such a touching text message conversation. Lol! I haven't gotten anything like that from my real siblings yet though. I wake up and look at my groom and think that I am so blessed to have him. One night I just lay in bed and whispered I love you to him. He woke up and said it back.

I finally feel like the grown up and not just the kid sister. I am the 6 of 7 children ( in my household). I am still considered the baby or baby sis. I was the tag a long. I was the crybaby and one who they were made to play with.

I feel like now I am no longer up under their wings and I can fly. I can hold on to Lamar's hand and face life with him. I am all grown up!

Sex and the City

2008-06-14T08:48:00.001-07:00

Last night I went to see Sex and the City. Oh the memories that it brought up. I was reminded of my college days and how easy and carefree things were and how dating was such a game. If you've never played the dating game you've missed out on something. If you always were the love seeking type then I feel so sorry for you. The instant that love is the objection, then the game is over. It is no longer a game to you.

Sex and the City catches the girls up at a different point in their lives. A point where they are all grown up. I'm not no talking age either. Clearly these ladies are "mature". I realized that I am at a point in my life where I am all grown up. No more silly nicknames for the guys that I am playing with. No more laughing at commitment. I am getting married in 35 days. Just 35 days!! I am so happy with the growth that I have made. As I watched the movie, I realized that those issues are the things that can go on in my life now. There is no more just running around the city ( Not NY but in my case Detroit definitely not Flint) looking for a drunken good time. I have a child and a husband to be to come home too. While my single and childless friends were continuing on with the escapades of a young life, I have settled down. I have a career and a family. My priorities have changed. I related with Miranda on so many levels in the movie. It seems you begin to lose yourself, but really you are becoming something brand new. You are adding a new dimension to your life.

What really happened with Sex and the City was that I began to really miss my friends. I have but 3 close dear friends who will see me through it all. I missed them so much watching that movie. I enjoyed the company of the girls I went to see the movie with but I missed my BFFs even more. We're not Carrie, Miranda, Charlotte, and Samantha but boy did we have a good time too.

So no one RSVPs the right way I see.

2008-06-07T14:54:00.000-07:00

Yes, I'm pretty pissed about the whole RSVPing thing still. Let me explain why. Please bare with me. I may sound a bit bridezillish too. That is my disclaimer.
My fiance and I wanted a nice size wedding of about 80-100 people. Things happened and we agreed on inviting our closest 60 people. Some people weren't even really closest but they were family and we had to keep the peace. I am a budget bride and I have made plenty of things myself. I really enjoyed doing it. Doing things on my own saved me plenty of money and I saw things from a whole new perspective.
I'm not picky either. I even designed the invitations on my own. I got them for a pretty good cost I think.
We sent out invites on May 10th. I gave a pretty late RSVP date for my guests in Michigan and all over the place. I even left the option of RSVPing online for those who are internet savvy. The RSVP is probably one of the most important parts of the invitation. Actually for the bride and groom it is. This lets us know how much more money we're going to have to spend.
I kindly let people know how many people they could invite by writing in the number of seats we reserved for them. We've had people add another person still.
Don't you find that pretty inconsiderate? I'm sure if we could afford to have that third person we would've invited someone else. We would've invited another close friend or family member . I don't get why people think it is okay for them to invite others to a wedding or any other personal event.
So from behind the scenes.. I won't go into the cost of our wedding because that information is private. I will say that every extra unvited guest is not free. We will be charged for them. Not only that but a certain number over could cause the venue to be understaff. If it is understaffed then the quality of service goes down. That will lead to unhappy supervisors, workers, guests, brides and grooms. I don't have time for all that.
This is not a wedding where Big Mama and the church will be catering. Or a community wedding. I think that if people would even just ask we might be able to see if we could work something out. But they don't. They assume. We end up being the bad guys when we call and tell them that we don't care who their guest is but they had better pick one and not two.
Now for those who don't RSVP at all. That is a pain as well. We took the time to pay for an RSVP enclosure and the stamp ( with the rates increasing mind you) and you couldn't take the time to write your name on it and check yes or no? Okay so say you don't have time to drop a postcard back into a mailbox. No problem. We left you another option. This option not only allows you to RSVP but you can get the directions to the venue. If by chance you need to bring an extra guests, you can even email us from that site to ask permission to do so.
I wonder if people would like it if they invited us over for dinner and we decided to bring a few others with us. They wouldn't like it all. Especially if those others came empty handed. No one made enough food for them and now everyone else's serving gets smaller.
I also wonder if people have seen what is going on in the economy today. Do they really think that a couple who had to go down to one income can afford to let them bring people random people?
This seems minor to the people are getting the RSVPs. But it's not to those who are expecting them. Even if you think it is expected that you are coming to someone's wedding, you should always RSVP to let the bride and groom know. If nothing else to acknowledge that you got the invitation.

Why I am getting married!!

2008-04-28T17:36:00.000-07:00

" Oh I'm marrying him for his good benefits" That is the reponse I'd like to give to those who ask me why I have decided on my fiance. Honestly I think that he chose me. He is great catch. He is so patient and kind to me. He has put up with my psycho pregnancy hormones from my daughter, is supporting us, and still makes time to clean up after me. I think I have it made. I watched another couple this weekend. It disturbed the hell out of me. The wife talked to her husband as if he were a child. I didn't see them hug, say good night, kiss, hold hands, call each other babe or anything. I couldn't imagine not touching my fiance. I couldn't imagine him calling me by first name everytime he talked to me. To hear him call me by my real name..I shudder. I know he is mad then.

Oh so why am I marrying this man? Simply put ..but it's kinda complex too. I love him. I am strong enough to live without him. But he makes me so weak for him that I don't ever want to. I love being his love slave. I love pretending to be mad at him and him not caring that I am mad but still loving on me. I love the way he fits perfectly with me. I love that he can go shoe shopping with me and pick out the cutest pairs of shoes for me. He calls me sexy no matter what I look like. He rubs my back until I fall asleep if I ask him to. He waits for me to nag him until he does things that I ask. He forgets that I asked him sometimes. He snores louder than me. he is always hot and I am always cold.

I love that I love him. I love that I want him and that I don't need him.

The strength of a stepmother

2008-03-13T21:58:00.000-07:00

As a young girl I always knew that I would be a mommy. It's something that I never thought twice about. Somehow and someway I was going to be someone's mama! Not once did I imagine that my "first" child would not have been the one in my own womb. My first child was carried by another woman. Someone whom I have never even met. We don't look alike. We have never spoken on the phone. But the child was not adopted. He will be my stepson.
I grew up with a stepdad and some stepsiblings. But the word step does not exist in my family. We are all brothers and sisters and my dad is my dad. So now I have a son. I am happy. I have two children and you could never tell. I bounced back pretty quickly actually. As happy as I am , I still have moments of sadness. There are times when I wish that the child was my own son to keep everyday and to not return to the one who birthed him. On Mondays when he goes to school and tells his little sister " I'll be back". I wish that he was mine. When he wakes up and I greet him with a smile and he jumps in my arms..I wish he was mine. When I know that my fiance is dealing with problems that she is causing..I wish he was mine. When he wakes up in the middle of the night and I am the one who has to answer him..I wish he was mine. Usually he is screaming for mommy or daddy. I realize that I am neither one of them. Sometimes it hurts so deep.
You can't change the past or nor should you regret it. I am happy to be the second mommy to him. I know that what I contribute to him will last a lifetime. I know that he loves me as much as he knows how. I know that everyday I am fighting for his respect. I know that I can't discipline him like his dad does. He knows that he can't run over me like he can his dad though.

Why the strength of a stepmom? What makes us so strong? Well we are the ones who are expected to love this child unconditionally as if they were are own, but yet we are not to expect the same love back. We expect to hear "you're not my mom!" yet we can never say to the child " you are not my child!". We expect for the other mom to tell her child that we are wrong and to badmouth us but we can never badmouth the child's mom ( to them anyway). Those few things make us strong. On top of all of that we still share our man with his past. He can never let go of it because he created a future with his past. So we accept his mistakes and we have to welcome her as well. She just became a part of our life. We are strong!

Forgive and Hit Delete

2008-03-04T22:12:00.000-08:00

Everyday I learn something new about myself, my child and my fiance. And he learns and she does too. But not all things learned are good. Some of the things that we learn have brought us to screams, to tears, to hugs, to kisses, to making love. No that was not the steps to make-up sex. It's a week in the life of love. But in there I forgot about prayer. See when the things that come up are not good and they hurt it is prayer that heals. Well it is the first part of healing. You pray for the one who hurt you. You pray that you heart heals and then you finally pray that you learn to forgive and hit the delete button. In our relationship we are growing together but together we are also growing in God. We have our Bibles, we attend church, we are learning our roles as husband and wife with our pastor and we are reading Godly literature. We have something that is called the Word for you Today.

Yesterday's( 3/4) word for the day was about forgiving and hitting the delete button. There is one part that reached me and touched my heart so deeply. " And when someone hurts or upsets us, God says, "Forgive, and hit the delete button!" Otherwise you will be corrupted with a virus that controls the way you think and talk. Worst of all,it'll keep you chained to the memories.

I read that over and over. And it hit so so close to home. The things in my past relationships I had to let go. The things that have hurt me in this relationship I have to let go. And I am now ready to. I have prayed for those who have hurt me and now I am ready to hit the delete button and when I hit it I am also going to empty the trash bin. It will not resurface. I will not let the devil come into my home and destroy my love.

All the wedding hooplah

2008-02-17T21:39:00.000-08:00

I love being a knottie. I think the knot really showed me what I needed to know about throwing a wedding. Today I watched rich bride poor bride and this chick wanted a tiara that cost $550.00 . I wanted to grab my baby powder. I thought she was so stupid for that. No one will be able to tell if the tiara came from Hobby Lobby, David's Bridal or the flea market. And anyone who can tell should not be in your face like that. The bride kept saying that it was her day. I never make comments like that. Everyday with my fiance is "my day". He showers me with love and attention everyday. Our wedding day will be the day we get married and the day we choose to celebrate. It won't be what I've always dreamed of. To have the day I dreamed of I would have to personally ask God to help plan my wedding. I mean down to the weather. I am having the wedding that I want and that is very important to me. If I want cupcakes arranged to look like a big "M" then I get that. You know why? Because everyday is my day. If I want someone to sing "she's your queen to be" from Coming to America I get it. You know why? Because everyday is my day. My fiance knows that I don't want much but what I do ask for I will get. He wants to make me happy. I don't need a platinum wedding. That won't make my marriage last.
Now on the knot people ask all of these questions about etiquette. Today what really got me was how many posts I read about labels. I'd rather have an invite sent to me with a legible label on it than me getting something that looks like my fiance wrote it. His handwriting sucks. You ever see someone write your name so bad that your name is no longer pretty you anymore. That's how bad it is. Would I hire a calligrapher for a birthday party? Nope so why my wedding?

Because of the wedding hooplah. Wedding hooplah says that you write out invites. Well my hand says "hell naw I'm not writing all that shit". So who wins? My hands!! I'll print them on labels if I feel like it.

Wedding Hooplah has made people write their bridal party and cuss them out. It has moms and daughters beefing. It has brides hating their fiance's family suddenly.

I'm investing in my marriage and not the wedding hooplah! My day will be full of my ideas and his ideas and as long as we are happy everyone else can kick rocks!

The Joy of Sex and Love

2008-02-12T19:34:00.000-08:00

I love sex. But more than I love sex I love the combination of sex and love. I've had sex without love and it was never right. I've had love without sex and it was okay. But I tell you the spiritual connection of sex and love is amazing. Bibilically I am living in sin. I will admit that before those who throw stones at me will. But deep in my heart I'm singing " If loving you is wrong, I don't want to be right". When I say "loving" I mean the act of "loving". I'm talking about whenI hold my fiance so tight and so near that I believe our souls are twisting with each other. Picture in your head a DNA strand or a twizzler. Some people think about marriage and gasp at the fact that you are doomed to have sex with one person for the rest of your life. I am happy for it. I don't have to go through the awkward first time sex, the curiosity of when it will get better, waiting to show how I really get down. I can get down and dirty in my morning breath and he'll call me again. I never understood why girls went through the trouble of trying to be so cute for a guy they were dating. After you have sex with that guy you might as well stop fronting. He's seen your fuck faces. He's seen what you look like in the morning(if you got to stay the night), he's seen you naked. No make up can cover all that up. And what I love about being with one guy is that I never have to wear clothes again. I can wake up and not rush to put on my clothes. My fiance and I walk around like we don't own a pair of pants or a shirt.

Back to the sex. When you are in love and you fight, the pain of arguing hits hard. But you the satisfaction of make up sex is even harder. When you fight with someone you don't care about you are wasting your time. Why bother and since you don't care you damn sure won't be giving anything up. But when you fight with someone you love and you make up. That connection of realizing how important you are to each other is irreplacable. I think when we have make up sex I flash back to all the great things we have accomplished. I think about how deep our love is and how sweet it is. And most importantly I think about how I don't want to have sex or be with anyone else.

But the best part of having love and sex together is making a baby. When you look at a child born to two parents who were making love you are looking at a love child. And that is the joy of sex and love.

The No Good Mother and the Deadbeat Dad

2008-02-03T21:28:00.000-08:00

In the last week I have talked to people that I care about concerning the other parent of their child. In the last week I have helped to bad mouth two horrible mothers and one terrible dad. In all three cases I wish I could add them to the Bitch slap list. But I really don't know any of them so a random Bitch Slap wouldn't even be as fun.

Case #1 : The Pyscho Ex Mom
My ex-boyfriend has one of the craziest mother drama I have ever heard of. He meets this girl weeks or days after we break up (supposedly) and find himself pregnant. He stays with the girl who has no high school diploma but finally got her GED and supports her and the child. Something occurs ( he won't tell me) and the "relationship" ends with him returning to his original state. During the "break-up" process the chick tells him that his baby might not be his. And after saying such she begins to deny him the right to see his child. UGH!! STUPID!! So then months of him calling and trying go by and all they do is argue and fight but he doesn't get to see the child. She drunk dials him and calls him while high and complains that he is a deadbeat dad. He has even forwarded the messages to me and I can tell that she is on something. The last message this weekend she tells him in on text message that he can come to see the child who will be 1 in March but she does not want to see him. And that he should apologize to the child for being MIA. She also lets it be known that he cannot claim his daughter on his taxes because she is going to do it and when she gets her check she plans to buy a car. So not only did the ex hit jackpot with this chick but she's very bright as well!! A few text messages go by and the chick changes her mind and decides that he can no longer see her.
Now why is she stupid? Whether she can stand the boy or not keeping his child from him will not make him get back with her. And why would you tell a man that a baby is not is and then expect support from him. If nothing else she should look at him getting the baby as a break for her. She says over and over that she has been doing it on her own. No one is forcing her to!

Case #2 : The Deadbeatest Dad in the world.
My dear girlfriend married her high school sweetheart a few years after they had been a high school item. He proposed, they got married, he asked for a baby and she delivered one for him. Then he suddenly wanted out of the marriage and he left them both. Leaving her was fine but you don't leave the child you begged her to have. After basically leaving her with nothing he decides to buy a house. Well the dummy forgot that he would have to pay child support. He's not paying the full amount because my friend is not being greedy she just wanted help with childcare, for him to spend time with his baby, and enough money to actually support the child. Well because things are so rough for her she decided to move back to her home town.( She moved across country for him while pregnant only to be left when he got settled). But she can't leave so soon. He has to consent for her to take the baby out of the state. He won't sign the letter. He hasn't spent time with the baby since June. Why does he care that the baby leaves? But the icing on the cake is that he sends her text messages asking her to lower child support because he can't afford to pay that and his mortgage on his 4 or 5 bedroom home. WTF? I advised her to get every dime she deserves and to stop being nice. He's not even honoring the part where he is supposed to help with childcare so he's still getting over!

How dare hr ask a woman to have hidbaby and then leave her and the child and expect to not have any responsibility! He sucks plain and simply and if I saw him on the street I'd hit him with my car.

Case #3 : The childish mother

This is the ex of my fiance. I don't even know her and I want to smack her. She pulls so many stunts. First she keeps the child from him and then she's not home so that he can go home. I'm not going to put the whole story out there but I just want to say that at 2 years old he knows what the hell is going on. He came home and told me " Mommy gone!" I wanted to grab my keys and meet her on her own front porch with my face vaselined up and my crisp Nike Shox on!

If she wanted to go out all you had to do was call and ask him to keep him another night. We are not her babysitting services. I charge $10 an hour if she wants a babysitter. And one day his trust issues will be messed up because of the stunts she prove. And yet it is so hard to get a child from their mother.TRICK!!

As a mother I expect all other mothers to be supreme at what they do. I know it is hard. I don't mean be perfect. I mean do your best and if it is your best then you are being perfect and supreme. I know parenting is hard but when your baby has a good mother or father don't mess it up by being an ass.

To bitch slap or not to bitch slap

2008-01-29T13:33:00.000-08:00

I have a list of reasons why I want to bitchslap people.
I'll start with my exes though. I want to bitch slap some of them for being assholes throughout our relationship and then start acting like cared and loved me so much. Who cares that your well ran dry and now you miss the water? Not me or my loving fiance who gets all my love all the time! Bitch get out of here!!
Next I'd like to bitch slap the Humana Insurance company that my sister works for. They are refusing to let her off so that she can attend my wedding. How can you deny someone time off so far in advance..Bitch get out of here

I'd like to bitch slap my own little sister for choosing a sorority convention over being with me for the most important day of my life..Bitch don't ask me for shit!

I'd like to bitch slap my daughter's Social Security caseworker for not being in the office. And the whole office for not making sure his cases were being worked and for having me wait for someone to pick up for a combined time of over and half hour. No one picked up. So when I do make it down to the office..someone will get bitch slapped!

By now my hand would hurt so I'm done !

Today I blog!!

2008-01-27T09:47:00.000-08:00

I told someone last night that I would start blogging today. So here I am writing down the most random thoughts that go through my head. I watched Joel Olsteen this morning. It was my way of going to church. My fiance and I have to alternate going to church until our daughter can get out. I always get the message loud and clear when I listen to him. But watching TV is not a subsitute for going to church. I love the service at my church. I love the music and how personal it is. After I watched church I watched the Real Housewives of Orange County. So confused as to how they are called real when they all have plastic surgery. They look soooooo fake. I'll accept my body the way it is. I'm not going under the knife. I was terrified to have a C-section so I know I'm not going to go willingly. Well for today this is a start. I really had nothing on my mind. I'm hungry and tired. I think I'll eat breakfast and then take a nap with my princess.